Big City Folk Go Home!
by Fred on 30/01/06 at 11:33 pm
8 comments
I have just come back from Outeniqua in the Western Cape, South Africa, possibly one of the most beautiful spots in the world.
Drive along the Wilderness, on the famous ‘Garden Route’, where you can breathe easy and your ears fill with sounds of Loeries and the sea churning nearby. The oldest houses here are priceless gems that blend into the lush vegetation, with old fisherman cottage style leanings, modest and respectful to the surroundings.
Then, turn to the ridges looking down over the highway and you will notice that some evil folk have transported their unspeakable architectural musings to this serene setting. Houses of steel and facebrick; garages painted a mix of black death and pink; tilted fronts with picture windows scything up into the sky like massive middle fingers gesturing at passers-by.
And, believe me, this is not isolated to WIlderness and George. Stroll down some of South Africa’s other coastal towns: Sandbaai, Pringle Bay (don’t even mention the igloo houses), Jeffrey’s Bay etc. and you will see what I’m talking about. You will see houses inspired by the old Health and Racquet Club corporate colours, Roman arches in the middle of gardens (with no house attached), pillars adorned with eagle sculptures, and, finally, a crapload of gnomes and beer-keg postboxes.
Let alone tainting these small towns with an unwanted multi-coloured brush, these clowns are branding themselves to the rest of the world as rich shameless gluttons whose wanton drawings on their big city coffee tables are unwelcome in these picturesque parts of the world.
Fred Roed is the marketing guy in the Ideate crew. He runs a web marketing company called World Wide Creative and loves writing about people out there doing marketing right. View more articles by Fred.
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Andrew
Jan 31st, 2006
Are you suggesting that if you were offered one of those homes you would refuse it?
Fred
Jan 31st, 2006
Ok, smartypants – here is my answer to that:
1. no, I wouldn’t refuse it. I would take it. I would then sell it at a nominal price to a decent architect to raize it and rebuild it with a bit of sensitivity to surroundings
2. I would take my winnings and buy one of the older houses and kick back.
Jon
Jan 31st, 2006
As a member of the greater metropolis that we so fondly call “Gauteng�, I need to respond to this.
It’s probably well known that the owners of these houses would originate from the great metropolis itself. ‘Vaalies’ as we are so affectionately known among all the coastal towns of South Africa.
Whether it is our luminous poly shorts or our polystyrene ‘boogie’ boards, we have constantly been ridiculed on our vacations.
In this light I wasn’t to stand in defense of the ‘Vaalie’. Vaalies are always the ‘love to hate’ crowd of any local beach town. And I understand that we make a noise and that our houses are…’branding {ourselves to the rest of the world as rich shameless gluttons whose wanton drawings on their big city coffee tables are unwelcome in these picturesque parts of the world.’
This is the kind of talk that produces suicide bombers! However let me just say that if you’re the economic powerhouse of the nation you get to choose what degree of ugly your house is.
Fred
Jan 31st, 2006
Brother, did I mention Joburg once? Cape Town is a big city, is it not?
Nevertheless, by your rantings on this post you have pretty much stuck your head into the searchlight looking for the criminals dumping their depraved imaginations on our pristine coastlines. Nice one Gauteng-boy; thanks for being so honest!
In the meantime, please speak to your Palm pressing pals and tell them to take their houses back to Brakpan.
Jon
Feb 1st, 2006
Fred, I totally understand. I’m sure that to you Cape Town folk the idea of development is a scary one. I know Palm tops can be quite scary at first but they really are not that dangerous.
Perhaps it’s the fact that you Kaapies are always so high, on your doob. Or perhaps it’s that you are all gay! Either way you guys are a bunch of freaks. Totally oblivious to the added value that these shore-line developments have brought to your doob smoking, tree hugging gay parade.
Steve
Feb 1st, 2006
jon that is so completely overboard funny, but definately taking hometown patriotism to another level.
Let me just put my 2c on the map. Here in Durbs, development has got me nerotic and shivering in a dark corner. Besides the fact that all builders seem to take twice as long as they say to complete anything, it seems that the other 11 people in my block of flats have conspired against my wife and i, and have organised some sort of underground build-a-thon. Just as one person completes their month of bashing, drilling and grinding, the next one takes the torch and continues.
6 months of continuous develpment has got to get anyone down, even if you live near the centre of the metropolis ia i do. Add to that the fact that i have a 4 week old son, you’ll see why i’m looking for a quiet granny flat/simplex/cardboard box to move into.
Fred
Feb 2nd, 2006
Steve, wherever you move to you can rest assured that Jon and his heartless bulldozing comrades from Jozi will rid the place of any ‘pesky vegetation’ within a 5 mile radius.
Best you start growing some pot plants cos that’s the only source of oxygen you’ll get.
Jon
Feb 3rd, 2006
It’s so easy to say that those who push the frontier and forge civilisation into development are ‘heartless’.
I see how development can seem scary and unsettling, but I hope you all apreciate that without the comrades of the concrete empire, you would all still be bound to landlines and telkom.